letting go

the last six months of my life have been the most intense for my personal growth. i not only experienced the most severe heart rupturing breakup of my adult life, but i also lost my grandmother, someone whom i was very close with, despite being over 7,000 miles apart. the last time my heart felt so much palpable pain, my brother was sentenced to 40 years in prison in 2016.

i spent this past summer wrestling with so many emotions, experiencing more rage than i have ever known, and shedding tears that felt like they were never going to end. the process deeply exposed me and revealed so much of what i have left to work on, acceptance and self-love being the primary lessons. coming out on the other side of the grief work has been liberating in ways i could not have imagined while going through the storm. it feels as though a boulder has been removed from my heart and now, with all the awareness i have gained, i am letting go. i feel clear, liberated, and at peace.

the root of my work is my desire to fix and save. it is something in me that is deeply programmed i believe since before my birth… perhaps something i carried over from other lifetimes. it is no coincidence that people always arrive with their hearts open to me, with their lot in their hands, asking for my guidance. of course, i feel grateful for this gift, but there are times when i don’t know where their work begins and where my guidance ends.

a lot of my own suffering comes from my inability to watch others in their suffering without feeling the need to sacrifice myself to take away their pain. what i finally understand from this summer is the most loving and compassionate thing i can do is give someone the space to deal with themselves. we are all only responsible for our own life and not everybody in this lifetime is going to be ready to do the work on themselves. 

the biggest illusion we are under the influence of is that there is a magical human out there who will come into our lives and save us from ourselves, who will be what we need. the sooner we snap out of that and realize that only we can save ourselves, the deeper we will be able to breathe and lean into fully who we are. seeing ourselves in our mess, in the soft spots that feel tender, in the parts we do not want others to see, and all the magic we are allows us to see others as they are. when we can fully see, we can let go.

i am closing out the year setting powerful intentions, you can join me for a morning or an afternoon practice in my home studio to cultivate your 2020 vision. sign up here.

come to ethiopia with me next year, it will not only teach you about yourself, it will offer all the wonderful culture present for your spiritual evolution. send me a note to make your $500 deposit, the retreat will take place from october 25-november 3, 2020. 

are you interested in becoming a yoga teacher or deepening your practice through yoga teacher training? linda lang and i are seeking one student for our 2020 yoga alliance approved teacher training program.

my ears and my heart are always here for you. i wish you happy holidays and abundance beyond your wildest dreams in 2020.

may you learn to fully love, forgive, and accept yourself.




big love,


Nya.